I'm not shutting this blog down, but life is getting in the way and I now have two other blogs to manage (and rather a few social media accounts). So instead of making promises to update, I'm going to promise I won't be updating for a while. I might pop in every now and then to share what I'm up to, but mostly you will be able to find me on my other blogs. I'll post the links to those when they are completely up and running (still in the works) and give you a preview of what I've been working on (new business!)
Happy writing, one and all. It's what makes my life worth living and, I hope, fills yours with joy too.
Showing posts with label afterwards. Show all posts
Showing posts with label afterwards. Show all posts
Sunday, July 10, 2016
Monday, March 21, 2016
The Great Purge
I used to love to collect things. Lots and lots of things. I've never been a hoarder, but I had things I collected, and I would collect anything that pertain to it. Like coins. I have a huge coin collection. And Beanie Babies. And collector's editions of magazines.
In the last ten years, I've moved a lot. Most things have stayed in my parents' basement, because there was room for it there. I've done without a lot of things while I moved to and from England several times. And it's amazing what you don't miss. I didn't miss any of that stuff I'd collected. I collected a few other things, but each time I moved back to Canada I got rid of a lot of stuff. My goal was if it didn't fit in two book boxes and two suitcases, it wasn't coming back with me. And I was pretty good about that (I was better the second time around).
But since I've been back I've been purging. And I realise this comes from the time I lived in England and the travelling I've done. You learn to live without a lot of things. But in England, I learned to give stuff away. Charity donations of stuff is big over there, and nearly every month I made a trip to one of the shops to hand over a bag, and most people I knew did the same. It became a thing: the seasonal purge of stuff for the donation box. And as time went by, I got more selective about what I bought or acquired. I started to judge things by whether I actually needed them or not.
That has continued. I have no money now, so not buying stuff is rather a necessity. But even if I did have money, I've become more deserving about asking 'want or need?' And if it's want, it almost always goes back on the shelf.
It feels great to get rid of things. I've got boxes of stuff in the basement I haven't looked at in 10 years. That's a long time to go without something, so out it goes. It feels good to donate. It feels even better to purge. A lot of people collect stuff, or keep stuff they don't need, because they have space or because they think 'I'll need it one day'. But we hold on to a lot of things and things take the place of people. Or happiness. Or whatever you feel you're missing in life.
Getting rid of almost everything has taught me that there are things missing in my life. Important things. And stuff will not replace those empty spaces. I need to fill them with love, with a partner, with a career I adore, with close friends I love. Stuff won't fill them up, and it's only been a bandaid over the years.
But getting rid of stuff? It just feels good. I've always loved spring cleaning, and doing it every week of the year is liberating! Freeing! It feels amazing to rid myself of baggage and start fresh.
There's a world out there and I want to see it and live in it. And now I can, with just a couple of suitcases. The nice thing about that? I can take them with me on the plane. No more shipping internationally. No more boxes and boxes of crap I don't need living 3000 miles from me. Just my clothes, my dearest possessions, and people. And those you can take anywhere.
In the last ten years, I've moved a lot. Most things have stayed in my parents' basement, because there was room for it there. I've done without a lot of things while I moved to and from England several times. And it's amazing what you don't miss. I didn't miss any of that stuff I'd collected. I collected a few other things, but each time I moved back to Canada I got rid of a lot of stuff. My goal was if it didn't fit in two book boxes and two suitcases, it wasn't coming back with me. And I was pretty good about that (I was better the second time around).
But since I've been back I've been purging. And I realise this comes from the time I lived in England and the travelling I've done. You learn to live without a lot of things. But in England, I learned to give stuff away. Charity donations of stuff is big over there, and nearly every month I made a trip to one of the shops to hand over a bag, and most people I knew did the same. It became a thing: the seasonal purge of stuff for the donation box. And as time went by, I got more selective about what I bought or acquired. I started to judge things by whether I actually needed them or not.
That has continued. I have no money now, so not buying stuff is rather a necessity. But even if I did have money, I've become more deserving about asking 'want or need?' And if it's want, it almost always goes back on the shelf.
It feels great to get rid of things. I've got boxes of stuff in the basement I haven't looked at in 10 years. That's a long time to go without something, so out it goes. It feels good to donate. It feels even better to purge. A lot of people collect stuff, or keep stuff they don't need, because they have space or because they think 'I'll need it one day'. But we hold on to a lot of things and things take the place of people. Or happiness. Or whatever you feel you're missing in life.
Getting rid of almost everything has taught me that there are things missing in my life. Important things. And stuff will not replace those empty spaces. I need to fill them with love, with a partner, with a career I adore, with close friends I love. Stuff won't fill them up, and it's only been a bandaid over the years.
But getting rid of stuff? It just feels good. I've always loved spring cleaning, and doing it every week of the year is liberating! Freeing! It feels amazing to rid myself of baggage and start fresh.
There's a world out there and I want to see it and live in it. And now I can, with just a couple of suitcases. The nice thing about that? I can take them with me on the plane. No more shipping internationally. No more boxes and boxes of crap I don't need living 3000 miles from me. Just my clothes, my dearest possessions, and people. And those you can take anywhere.
Saturday, February 13, 2016
What Happens After NaNo
I talk a lot about NaNo, but beyond complaining about editing, I haven't really talked about the afterwards. Often, there isn't an afterwards. Half-finished or un-edited novels languish on hard drives the world over and no one ever gives them a second glance.
That is what happened with my first two novels. I finished them, but I never edited them. Mostly, I thought they were crap and might as well be rewritten from scratch than edited.
But in 2014 I wrote a novel for NaNo that I didn't think was an utter waste of words. I spent all of last year editing it, and even had it test read. I'm still polishing up the last few things on my long list of 'issues', but at least those are the little things like continuity of hair colour and making sure the calendar is right (there are a lot of events that happen in a very few number of days - and there are still only 24 hours in a day in this world).
Editing was not fun. There were times it was, but overall it was as hard work as writing the novel had been, and that hadn't been easy. This was not one of those 'words flowed onto the page' novels. This was a lot of work to outline, plot, world build, and then write. And it was just as hard to edit afterwards. It was scary as anything to have test read, because I've offered up plenty of my writing for public consumption, but never let a single person near my novels. Asking people to 'please read this and give me your brutally honest opinion' is terrifying. There's no way to do it without thinking 'what if they say it's awful and I should just delete it?'
They didn't, thankfully. They were actually very supportive and very helpful, and found issues I hadn't noticed. One of them was especially excited, because it was exactly her sort of genre and she fell in love with the story. Which is always a nice pick-me-up. That didn't mean she didn't send me a long list of questions, though, but at least I know what I have now is something she'd pick up off a book shelf. So I have a reading audience of one. It's a start.
Now I'm struggling with the next big thing: building an audience and a brand. I have no desire to self-publish (unless I exhaust every other avenue), but I still want to position myself in a way that will appeal to agents. I don't have a website (well, not one that's public anymore - thankfully), but I do have this blog. And so it's going to become much more writing focused in the coming weeks. And I'm going to be much more honest about the nitty-gritty. This is just the introduction post.
That is what happened with my first two novels. I finished them, but I never edited them. Mostly, I thought they were crap and might as well be rewritten from scratch than edited.
But in 2014 I wrote a novel for NaNo that I didn't think was an utter waste of words. I spent all of last year editing it, and even had it test read. I'm still polishing up the last few things on my long list of 'issues', but at least those are the little things like continuity of hair colour and making sure the calendar is right (there are a lot of events that happen in a very few number of days - and there are still only 24 hours in a day in this world).
Editing was not fun. There were times it was, but overall it was as hard work as writing the novel had been, and that hadn't been easy. This was not one of those 'words flowed onto the page' novels. This was a lot of work to outline, plot, world build, and then write. And it was just as hard to edit afterwards. It was scary as anything to have test read, because I've offered up plenty of my writing for public consumption, but never let a single person near my novels. Asking people to 'please read this and give me your brutally honest opinion' is terrifying. There's no way to do it without thinking 'what if they say it's awful and I should just delete it?'
They didn't, thankfully. They were actually very supportive and very helpful, and found issues I hadn't noticed. One of them was especially excited, because it was exactly her sort of genre and she fell in love with the story. Which is always a nice pick-me-up. That didn't mean she didn't send me a long list of questions, though, but at least I know what I have now is something she'd pick up off a book shelf. So I have a reading audience of one. It's a start.
Now I'm struggling with the next big thing: building an audience and a brand. I have no desire to self-publish (unless I exhaust every other avenue), but I still want to position myself in a way that will appeal to agents. I don't have a website (well, not one that's public anymore - thankfully), but I do have this blog. And so it's going to become much more writing focused in the coming weeks. And I'm going to be much more honest about the nitty-gritty. This is just the introduction post.
Saturday, December 19, 2015
Best Laids Plans of Writers and Academics
Let me just be honest: I gave up on December NaNo about December 3rd. I had the best of intentions, but like many things in life, even the best laid plans have to be sidetracked. December is the type of month that can either be great for me, or miserable, or both. This year, it's not been a particularly good month, and it never helps that I get anxious this time of year about the fact that another year is ending and I didn't do half the things I wanted to.
But that's normal. That's par for the course. But it makes writing hard. I also know from experience that I am much better in an empty house. I cannot write in public places. I also can't write very well in company. And I've had nothing but company this month, even more so than in November (and I managed NaNo with international travel!) It happens. I am slowly ploughing away at finishing the novel I didn't quite manage to finish last month (to be fair, 50k is rather short, and this one needs to be 70k).
That is my only goal this month. I am trying to be kind to myself and do only what I can actually manage each day, and not feel like a failure if I don't accomplish the To Do list. Or feel guilty for not being able to. I promised myself a year ago I would start doing this, and then life threw a loop-d-loop my way and this year has been full of (not always pleasant) surprises. Instead, I am making that promise again. Do only what I can. There are times to push oneself, and I'm generally pretty good at those, but for the rest of this year, I need to just be okay.
And that's enough for the busiest, craziest, most expensive month of the year. There is absolutely nothing wrong with baby steps. I think this might be what people mean when they talk about the year after the PhD.
But that's normal. That's par for the course. But it makes writing hard. I also know from experience that I am much better in an empty house. I cannot write in public places. I also can't write very well in company. And I've had nothing but company this month, even more so than in November (and I managed NaNo with international travel!) It happens. I am slowly ploughing away at finishing the novel I didn't quite manage to finish last month (to be fair, 50k is rather short, and this one needs to be 70k).
That is my only goal this month. I am trying to be kind to myself and do only what I can actually manage each day, and not feel like a failure if I don't accomplish the To Do list. Or feel guilty for not being able to. I promised myself a year ago I would start doing this, and then life threw a loop-d-loop my way and this year has been full of (not always pleasant) surprises. Instead, I am making that promise again. Do only what I can. There are times to push oneself, and I'm generally pretty good at those, but for the rest of this year, I need to just be okay.
And that's enough for the busiest, craziest, most expensive month of the year. There is absolutely nothing wrong with baby steps. I think this might be what people mean when they talk about the year after the PhD.
Wednesday, October 21, 2015
It's Over
A lot of people in Canada are very happy right now. I'm happy for one reason: it's all over for the next four years. Because I've had quite enough of politics to last me at least four years.
It's been an interesting insight into how things work, and how things do not. I have a lot of opinions on how our electoral system is run in this country, and a lot of ideas on how elections are run. And a lot of ideas of how we could do things better, because it can't get much worse.
So I've had an eye-opening experience, which for a contract job is, shall we say, quite impressive. I feel like I've learned a lot, both as a work experience, and also about myself, and those are things I can take forward. It will, at least, make for excellent answers in job interviews, if I ever get a job interview.
I am now going to spend the next month or so reassessing and readjusting, and resting. I feel like I barely recovered from the PhD before I got launched into election mode and I'm frankly exhausted again. There are some things I would really like to devote honest concentration and time to and I am hoping to spend the rest of the year in those pursuits. I feel like I've taken a step forward, and now I need to look around and make sure I'm on the right path, but continue to walk onwards at the same time; just with a bit more eyes-wide-open.
In other words, I hope to have more blog updates soon.
It's been an interesting insight into how things work, and how things do not. I have a lot of opinions on how our electoral system is run in this country, and a lot of ideas on how elections are run. And a lot of ideas of how we could do things better, because it can't get much worse.
So I've had an eye-opening experience, which for a contract job is, shall we say, quite impressive. I feel like I've learned a lot, both as a work experience, and also about myself, and those are things I can take forward. It will, at least, make for excellent answers in job interviews, if I ever get a job interview.
I am now going to spend the next month or so reassessing and readjusting, and resting. I feel like I barely recovered from the PhD before I got launched into election mode and I'm frankly exhausted again. There are some things I would really like to devote honest concentration and time to and I am hoping to spend the rest of the year in those pursuits. I feel like I've taken a step forward, and now I need to look around and make sure I'm on the right path, but continue to walk onwards at the same time; just with a bit more eyes-wide-open.
In other words, I hope to have more blog updates soon.
Wednesday, August 26, 2015
Attention Span of a Gnat
This might be insulting to gnats everywhere; just fair warning.
When I was little I would focus on one thing for hours. I was well known for being able to play a computer game for eight hours straight, or read an entire novel in a day.
Some things have not survived my PhD. That sort of attention span is one of them.
It's a funny thing, this 'other' side. Emerging from four years of intensive academia and finally having the time to take stock of what's changed. A few things were temporary (memory loss, hair loss, compromised immune system), and some things have not been temporary.
But the one that is causing me the most grief is the inability for anything to keep my attention for longer than about twenty minutes. Things I used to enjoy for hours I now grow bored of in minutes. I can't watch an hour of television, even with commercials to distract me (I can't watch it without commercials either, thanks Netflix). I can't read more than a couple of chapters of a novel. I can't read more than one academic article a day (and even then, if it's long...). And I can't do fun things. I get bored of Pinterest after ten minutes. I get bored of Twitter after five. I get bored of writing blog posts in the middle of writing blog posts.
I'm certain there's some psychological reason for all this. I'm quite certain someone could tell me why so long intensely concentrating on one thing has somehow hardwired my brain to not be able to concentrate on anything. And maybe I'm just - still - recovering, and it'll get better. But if anything, it's gotten worse.
It used to scare me a lot. The things stress does to the body. But I've gotten over that, mainly because a lot of the stress-related issues have gone away. But this one? This one may never, and I'm going to have to adjust to that. It's entirely doable, I'm sure. I just have to learn to do things in 5-10 minute windows, rather than do one thing for three hours.
Time to try to Pomodoro technique, I think.
When I was little I would focus on one thing for hours. I was well known for being able to play a computer game for eight hours straight, or read an entire novel in a day.
Some things have not survived my PhD. That sort of attention span is one of them.
It's a funny thing, this 'other' side. Emerging from four years of intensive academia and finally having the time to take stock of what's changed. A few things were temporary (memory loss, hair loss, compromised immune system), and some things have not been temporary.
But the one that is causing me the most grief is the inability for anything to keep my attention for longer than about twenty minutes. Things I used to enjoy for hours I now grow bored of in minutes. I can't watch an hour of television, even with commercials to distract me (I can't watch it without commercials either, thanks Netflix). I can't read more than a couple of chapters of a novel. I can't read more than one academic article a day (and even then, if it's long...). And I can't do fun things. I get bored of Pinterest after ten minutes. I get bored of Twitter after five. I get bored of writing blog posts in the middle of writing blog posts.
I'm certain there's some psychological reason for all this. I'm quite certain someone could tell me why so long intensely concentrating on one thing has somehow hardwired my brain to not be able to concentrate on anything. And maybe I'm just - still - recovering, and it'll get better. But if anything, it's gotten worse.
It used to scare me a lot. The things stress does to the body. But I've gotten over that, mainly because a lot of the stress-related issues have gone away. But this one? This one may never, and I'm going to have to adjust to that. It's entirely doable, I'm sure. I just have to learn to do things in 5-10 minute windows, rather than do one thing for three hours.
Time to try to Pomodoro technique, I think.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)